Tuesday, December 24, 2013

AOTY 2013: Top 10 failures

I don't want to widely justify why these albums were a disappointment for me, that's why there will be the list only. Of course, I included albums from bands that I had hopes of something good and received a washed out, lame record, not just any bad album I came across this year. I'm usually polite with my negative points but some albums this year hit me hard and got on my nerves, so I present the hate.

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10. Ghost B.C. - Infestissumam
Loma Vista Recordings

Stop worshiping this band like they're the inventors of music because it's really nothing more than fancy dark cloaks and pseudo satanic imagery. I would stand this album if it was not so shallow and annoying. While Opus Eponymous almost had a couple of nice rhythms, this fails everywhere.

9. Nocturnal Poisoning - A Misleading Reality
Self-released

I do not want Xasthur back either and that's not the reason why I put this in the list. I was actually interested to listen what would this acoustic project would be, but it shares little emotion after all. I was not touched by it at all and the repetitive mellow melodies made me sick. It's not atmospheric or melancholic as it was supposed. Keep going if you feel it guys, but I'm not going to follow.

8. Glorior Belli - Gators Rumble, Chaos Unfurls
Agonia Records

Did Glorior Belli always have so many stoner elements in their music? If these guys tried to mix black with stoner here, they totally failed, apparently they're not good at experimentation. Most of the songs are way too boring to even review this at all, spare your time with something better.

7. Alice in Chains - The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here
Capitol Records

The only thing that reminds of Alice In Chains with this band of today, is Jerry. All is fragile and mediocre, apart from Jerry, who is like the Iommi of grunge. This album will break the hearts of all grungeheads out there, because the once huge AiC are now mainstream, MTV rock. Fetch me!

6. Rotting Christ - Κατά το δαίμονα εαυτού
Season of Mist

I respect this band very much, but this is one of their worst albums I have listened, if not the worst. Incomprehensible subject, too many studio effects, hardly any solid guitar work. The whole album is like an introduction to a main part that never came after all. No.

5. Burzum - Sol Austan, Mani Vestan
Byelobog Productions

Ideal for sleeping! As much as I like his past albums up until Fallen (yes, all the way until Fallen) this one is average, spiritless ambient that bores me to death. Read more here.

4. Gehenna - Unravel
Indie Recordings

This is really bad, for something to come out after eight years of waiting. I don't expect Gehenna to return to the glorious times of their first four albums, but I didn't expect a snail paced, weak and monotonous album like this either. The production is horrible (are there any drums? Or is that a pumping noise behind the harsh guitar moaning) and the tracks are juvenile. I asked myself more than once during my first listen, are these the same Gehenna I knew?

3. Sepultura - The Mediator Between the Head and Hands Should Be the Heart
Nuclear Blast

Not a single good guitar riff was produced that day. Did you laugh with the title too? Wait to hear the music. Anyhow, Sepultura are long gone, the guys should stop raping the band's corpse and leave it at peace at once.

2. Satyricon - Satyricon
Roadrunner Records

Definitely one of the hardest punches in the face I got this year, from a band I adore(d) that decided to go, who knows what. The modern Satyricon play thin rock that even the last rebel laughs at. Again, do not get fooled by various music sources that call it a masterpiece and an album that will mark the future, the band's highest peak so far and other stupid statements like these. It's by all means bad. A bad album. Check my review here.

1. Megadeth - Super Collider
Tradecraft

I can't get into Mustaine's mind, what the heck is he thinking? Is he jealous of the wonderful carreer of Metallica and wants to be like them? Did he aim for another classy album like Risk? Did he forget how to write solid lyrics? He found God again and finally got educated about this scientific thingy called super collider that got him so impressed that he wrote an album that's close to the worst in his carreer. I don't put 0 in a rating easily, but this would get it. By far the worst album of the year and now my image of Megadeth is further damaged, for life.

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